Mangled instructions

[HARO]

While setting up a small fountain just now, I glanced at the label on the small pump. It says "Not to be used to drain the pool cover if there are people in the pool." Not only would it take forever to drain a few gallons off a pool cover, but how many people swim UNDER the pool covers? Just wondering!! Another pump in my posession states "Not for use in damp locations." This is a POND PUMP, for Pete's sake!! I'd just like to know if anyone else has experienced this idiocy.
John

 

[bettasngoldfish]

Gotta love it!

 

[adam9280]

Water related

Infant Child Life Vest: "Not to be used as a ski vest"

Thank you, I was thinking of taking my 1 yr old skiing.

 

[HARO]

On a pumice stone: "Rub on horny skin". Ouch!
John

 

[Troutredds]

Planting directions (printed in China) on a plant i.d. tag: "Plant only when danger of floss is passed." My dentist never explained the danger - can you ever be truly sure it's passed?!

 

[JohnHuff]

Lawyers...

 

[HARO]

Chinese translators....

 

[Fishylove]

More like cover thy arse......

 

[Troutredds]

On children's cough medicine: "Do not drive a car or operate machinery after taking this medication."

My personal favorite - on American Airlines packet of nuts: "Instructions: open packet, eat nuts."

 

[taherrmann4]

Here's a website full of them.. I like this one.
On a child's Superman costume:
Wearing of this garment does not enable you to fly.

http://funnytab.net/doomed

 

[HARO]

On children's cough medicine: "Do not drive a car or operate machinery after taking this medication."

My personal favorite - on American Airlines packet of nuts: "Instructions: open packet, eat nuts."

The last time I flew, my package of peanuts said "CAUTION... May contain peanuts."
John

 

[Mmathis]

Not exactly in this category, but I received a small pkg. in the mail the other day. It was sent from Thailand, had customs stamp, etc. On the customs label, under contents, it said "TOY."

OK, but I hadn't ordered any toys (of any kind).

Hubby & I were having fun trying to figure out what it was....

Opened it -- it was a bottle of fish food!!!

I'd ordered some fry food from AMAZON, and had gotten a notice that it was going to be delayed in shipping. This was it. So, since when is animal food considered a TOY?

Oh well, Hubby & I had a good laugh over it!